I hate March.

And we come to another Thursday. I can't tell if this week is going slow or fast. The weather keeps hopping all over the place from 70 degrees to 30-something and it's causing a lot of sniffling in my house. I think the dog even has allergy issues.

I also have this belief that March is the longest month of the year. Ok, technically maybe it has the same number of days but it's still winter-ish, it's right after the shortest month, and then you have to deal with the daylight savings and all the sudden it's pitch black AGAIN at 7am just when I got good at waking up on time. It's just not right. I wont' even start on daylight savings b/c I feel like I've beaten that with a stick for many years in a row. .... not going to comment....it's hard!

I hate March. I really do. Aside from the nasty looking weather before actual sunshine and spring start, and the daylight savings, there just isn't anything good about it. I loath St. Patricks Day as well. I know, what is sooooooooo bad about St. Patricks' Day?!?! It's not that I don't like beer, I like me a good pint, it's just never been a good time for me. And I really don't like that color green. Other things I hate about St. Patricks' Day in general:

1. Leprechans. Creepy small, shouldn't the be making cookies in a tree and not trying to trick people in letting them go or finding gold or whatever the heck that is all about?
2. Bars on St. Patricks' Day. Oh. My. God. If I wanted to be squashed in a smelly smoky place with about a zillion people drunker than me, well, I don't.
3. Bars serving at 6am beer specials with Lucky Charms. I dont' do early. I don't early. I don't DO early. and Ew.. I'd rather all memories of Lucky Charms include pj's and cartoons and not sticky floors and/or vomit.
4. I didn't know I was irish at all until I was lke 27. That actually made me feel very excluded in general on all the great years of celebrating I COULD have been doing, and now it's just too little too late.
5. Ireland. Really? What is so great about Ireland? Ok, I've never been. I dont' much care for potatoes, or rain, or green in general. Sheep, giant wool sweaters, darkness, dampness, vastness, golf, funny socks. REd hair is scary on everyone. I just don't get why they have a holiday and no other ethnic group or specific country does. I mean, didn't the irish have nothing be negative stigmitsms associated with them? Fights? Jail? Cops? Crookedness? Red hair? Ireland is in fact on the list of places I'm ok with NEVER visiting. (Sorry Lenore)
6. Cheap plastic parafanilia. On almost any other occassion I'm all about your cheap beads and bar glory, but for some reason, maybe it's the green, I loathe the St. Patricks' day garb. All of it. Hats, leys, beads, shot glasses on strings, t-shirts, buttons, face paint.....
7. Slogans. Kiss me I'm irish. This may stem from #4, again feel left out all your life and than just jaded. what can I do?
8. I've never actually had a GOOD time on St. Patricks DAy. Almost one time when I went to NYC for the parade, but we never left the bar, and it just got weirder from there until we ended up at Ruby Tuesdays with 47 glasses on a 4 top table and someone nearly LOST a LEG getting off the train. (Sorry about that too Lenore)

Maybe that is just it. I can not in good faith associate such a highly coveted drinking holiday (and I DO love me some drinking, ask around) with anything good, if nothing good has EVER happened to me on that day. It's not that I even have painfully bad memories of St. Patricks' Day, I just have no good ones. It's just a giant green platform of disappointment.